Irony of Situations

We all know that life is ironic. But some incidents make you believe this to the core. One such incident happened recently to me.

When I returned from the US, my Indian bank account debit card had expired, and since I was not in the country, I had not received a new one. I quickly put in a request for one. At the time, I was in Mumbai. As luck would have it, the card arrived when noone was home, and so it went back.

After a few days I called again. This time they assured me that the card would reach me in a few days. It didn't (for some weird reason).

I called again (If you have been involved in phone banking, you would know how frustrating this can be). By this time I was in Pune, so I gave them my Pune address. Now, giving them a new address means going through all their convoluted processes. For example, you cannot request for a card to be sent to a certain address, until
you have that address as your regular communication address in the system. You cannot change it in the system over phone on the same call, if you've logged into the call using your card number. Once you finally have the address changed in the system, it takes 24 hours for the change to be effective. Only once the change is effective, can you call again and request that the card be sent to a new address.

See, all this is fine, and I understand that things have to go through a process, especially when you are dealing with another person's money. But for me, time was running out. I had only a few hundred rupees left on me, and the month end was approaching. I had to pay the electiricity bill, phone bill, pay the maid, and basically I
was missing the independance of having money in my hands. I had to withdraw money asap.

Then one bhalaa maanus gave me an idea. Why don't I use his card (he never used that account much). He trusted me enough to share his pin with me, so I had a card I could use. All that was fine, but he hardly had any money in his account. Well, atleast not as much as I would want to use!

Meanwhile my extensive calls with the bank were getting even hotter. I was beginning to lose my temper. I had 300 bucks in my purse. I needed a damn card to access my money! On one final call I heard that the address to which I had requested the card be sent, was in an 'undeliverable area' (whatever that means), so the card had gone back to them (yes, yet again). This time they were taking no chances, and had sent it via a postal service. It would take another 11 days to reach me. I thought to myself, "Post, Post!!!!! After all this fuss, they finally send it via a regular, meagre post?!" Then I panicked "Did they say 11 days??!! 11 days on 300 bucks? "

On a frustrated night I was called by bhalaa maanus. He gave me a brilliant idea. Why dont I issue a check to transfer some money from my inaccessible account, into his account? Then I could use his card to withdraw moolah. I thought it to be a great idea and wondered why I didn't think of it myself.

The next problem was to look for my check book. I had no idea where it was. The next morning, I was check book hunting, and I'm pleased to say the hunt was successful.

Bhalaa maanus, who was also intelligent maanus, gave me a new idea again. Why don't I go to a bank, address a check to myself, and withdraw money? I thought about this..."Hmmm, this sounds like the perfectly logical, easiest and in your face solution. Now why on earth didn't I think of it? And why on earth did it take so much time
for bhalaa maanus to think of it?" I kept wondering, but couldn't reach an answer I liked.

Without wasting any time, I wrote two checks, one to myself, the other to BM (bhalaa maanus). The lure of money was too strong for me to be able to think of any other task that day.

Off I go to the bank, deposit one check, withdraw money with the other. I feel like on top of the world, suddenly there is light. I have money in my hands, the soft feel of green....Now there's no need to worry, now I can shop, now I can.....

I'm still dreaming when I return to my desk. I notice the phone is ringing. I decide to answer it. The man at the other ends says to me "Madam aapka post aaya hai, please abhi aakar gate se collect kar leejiye" :)